4 steps for choosing your new therapist

Step 0: Decide to go for it!

Yay – you did it! This can be a scary step, but we all have different reasons for deciding this is the moment to reach out for therapy. It may be a negative experience, like a panic attack, or a conversation with a friend who encourages you to prioritize your mental health, or a slow build-up of events (like a global pandemic, perhaps?). Regardless of what led you to this point, you’ve decided to undergo the challenging, thrilling, and often humbling work that is effective psychotherapy. Congratulations! You’ve taken a huge leap in the direction of growth!

Step 1: Get specific.

What things are important to you? Would you feel more comfortable with a specific gender or age of therapist? Do you have a preference when it comes to their approach or their theoretical orientation? Do you have a strong preference for their politics? Do you only have benefits coverage for a specific certification? These things matter. These are absolutely valid and important parts of your consideration. You can refine your search to reflect this ideal candidate on search engines or in Psychology Today, or you can refine your search in your network by describing who you’re looking for. I found my personal therapist after asking for help finding a “therapist who swears”!

Step 2: Start your search. 

Psychology Today is a classic, but you can also use your network or other online databases, some of which will allow you to search by fee. This can be essential in a country where mental health care isn’t considered universal healthcare, but that’s for another time. Different provinces will have different tools; in Ontario, we have OpenPath, which allows you to search for low-cost therapy. Pay attention to anything that comes up for you during your search – maybe you feel drawn to their photo (or turned away by the photo)! Maybe you’re interested initially, but then their website doesn’t vibe with you. Wait to find a few profiles or websites that you connect with, and then reach out!  

Step 3: Interview more than one therapist.

This is the most essential piece of information I can provide you with! As a client, the most important thing to you is your relationship with the therapist. Studies show that this is more important than the experience of the therapist or even the specific approach that they use. Your comfort with the therapist means you’re more able to share and collaborate with them, which means it’s the best possible use of your time in the session. Most therapists offer a free consultation for this exact reason! You should reach out to more than one therapist and do consultations with more than one therapist. Ask them questions. Get a sense of who they are and how they work.

Step 4: Go with your gut. 

Pay attention to your reaction to all parts of the interaction, from the initial email to the consultation itself. Remember – you’ll never need to justify why you connect more with one person over another. If you leave the interaction feeling like you’re on the fence, I’d challenge you to keep looking. Maybe you’re not looking forward to therapy, per se… but you should be feeling confident that this a person you’re willing to trust to support you through the process. If not, don’t panic – your match is out there. With online therapy, you’re not even limited to your own city! When I have found therapists in the past, I felt a connection from their online presence, which made me excited to speak with them for our consultation. During the consultations, I felt at ease which allowed to me feel confident that I was making the right choice – wait for your right fit!

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